The past few months have been a bit of a challenge for me. I was diagnosed with brain cancer in February. Since then, I’ve been going to treatment five times a weeks, reading everything I can get my hands on to learn about brain cancer, and taking as many naps as I can get. On top of all that, I’ve been pawning my belongings to pay for treatment and asking friends and family to help me.
The response has been overwhelming. Not only have friends and family reached out to support me – total strangers have sent me checks in the mail, saying that they heard about me through so and so, and that they wanted to help. I feel very blessed to have so many people standing in my corner.
The irony is that my own fundraising and cancer treatment have sidelined by efforts to raise money for abortion patients. I’m still involved with Abortion Access Network of Arizona, but I have had to substantially decrease my role. The reason that I say this is ironic is that over the course of the past year, AANA has raised approximately $8000. That’s great news. But the sad thing is that I’ve been able to raise $8000 for my cancer treatment in three months. What does that say about people’s attitudes around abortion?
I’m not asking this question as a form of criticism. I guess I am just expressing mixed emotions about the fundraising game. Please believe that I am very grateful for every penny that people have given me to help me fight my brain tumor. On the other hand, I wish that folks were just as passionate about helping people pay for their abortions. I don’t know how to reconcile those feelings.
For those of you who are part of abortion funds, how have you been able to connect with donors and get them motivated about funding abortions? When I compare AANA’s bowl-a-thon numbers to other funds who have raised between $10,000 – $20,000 at one event, I feel like we have a lot we can learn from the success of other funds. I’d love to get some ideas so that AANA’s fundraising can be as successful as my own efforts to raise money for my health care expenses. Got any suggestions?
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Serena is a freelance writer who enjoys baking, protesting, and playing with little dogs. |
I guess the thing is to not underestimate the power of a single story. Research shows over and over again – people respond best to stories of individuals rather than requests to donate to a general cause. That said, I’m so glad there were so many people out there willing to help you!
What Maria said! I can understand your frustration–and I’m going to add that it’s the sort of empathetic reaction that makes you an amazing woman. (Who people love and want to help you kick cancer’s butt!) I feel like everyone who donates to a cause knows that there are real people on the other end who are in real need. But I feel like it’s a self-protective fact of human nature that we keep those people as near or far as we can handle at any given moment.
Like you, I wonder sometimes if people don’t feel like raising funds for abortions is a “worthy” cause. My guess is there are plenty of people who’d rather not think about abortion at all. Then again, the reasons people give to any cause are probably pretty unique and based on their personal history or emotional response to something. We all know the guy who hates people but loves animals or the woman who’ll put in umpteen hours at the suicide hotline but whine about those homeless people who don’t suck it up and pull themselves up by their bootstraps.
Or maybe it’s best not to think about it too much. Just keep being thankful for the good wishes and blessings. You know what they say about positive energy, right?
Thank you for such a personal piece Serena. I agree that it is a lot different to donate money to someone who you may know or even know of, rather than to something like an abortion fund. While the money is used to help a woman in need, there is less urgency to do it when you will never really know who was helped.
Also, it occurred to me that many people have had someone very close to them struggle with cancer. On the other hand, because we don’t talk much about abortion in this society, it is safe to say that it is not as personal an issue, as many people are under the assumption that they don’t know women who have had abortions (which statistically is nearly impossible).
I am very happy to hear that the fundraising for your treatment has gone so well!
What Maria, Jodi and Janice said! Thank you so much Serena for sharing your personal struggle and your thoughts.
Well, I heard the story of a woman who needed money very quickly to be able to have an abortion in accordance with the legal deadline. I could not give money, but I got the message across.
It is like a chain reaction of good. Fortunately it can work: you are the proof of it!
A friend of mine was diagnosed with GBM (an aggressive brain tumor) last November. Money is POURING in to help her family with the many, many expenses associated with her treatment. I wonder if part of the disconnect is that it’s shocking for a 40-year-old to be diagnosed with terminal cancer–but abortion is so common it happens to one in three American women. Of course, the stigma remains that women who seek abortions are “bad,” and somehow deserve their fate, while women with brain cancer are tragic victims of random circumstance.
In any case, I hope you are able to release yourself of a little of the guilt I am reading in this post, and that you are able to connect with the gifts given by those who love and cherish you–both financial and emotional. You are in my thoughts!
Thanks for all of the positive feedback, ya’ll.
Shannon, you bring up such a good point about 1/3 women having abortions. The statistic for folks with cancer is similar. In the US, 1/3 adults will be diagnosed with cancer. But you make such a good point – people view cancer as a random occurrence, where women who have abortions are shamed for making the choice.
In terms of sharing patients’ stories, I wonder about the ethical obligation to get the patients’ permission first. What is your take?