Military Familes & the New Afghanistan Surge
Like most political topics, the U.S. offensive in Afghanistan is a complicated issue, despite attempts on all sides to reduce its complexity so that the situation can best be spun to suit a given ideology. As much as I would like for it to be as simple as “get us the hell out of there,” I’m just not sure that’s realistic or even possible any more than “lets kick some ass over there so we don’t have to fight them here” is.
The fact of the matter is that the world is a mess. Granted, much of the trouble has been caused and is being perpetuated by flawed U.S. foreign policy. But it is a mess, nonetheless. I have to be extra clear here: I was not in favor of the original invasion of Afghanistan or that of Iraq. In fact, invading Afghanistan after 9/11 made about as much sense to me as bombing Michigan would have after Oklahoma City.
Unfortunately, my friends, that ship has sailed. And we have not, even by getting rid of W, managed to instigate any large scale strategic shifts on the part of the U.S. government, at least as far as Afghanistan is concerned (Iraq is another matter, for another day). So. Fact number 2–for good or ill, Afghanistan is our problem and that problem is getting bigger by the moment.
Whether we agree with it or not, whether or not we would have chosen the same path, were we in charge, the reality is that what happens there is our responsibility as a nation. It is our military that is there and in our name. Young service members live and die there every day and they are most certainly our concern. Whether or not they have what they need to do the job they’ve been given is up to us. As is how they are treated when if they return home.
It seems to me that one of the MAIN reasons that we have stayed in Afghanistan (and Iraq) is that there is no public engagement with this war. Bush asked Americans to go shopping, spend money and stimulate the economy to pay for it, but beyond that, all of the U.S. sacrifices (the impact on Afghanistan’s people, though no less important, is also a topic for another post) made for these wars has been made by the military and their families. Everyone else goes on with their day-to-day lives with nary a tax increase, much less anything like rationing or a draft.
Don’t get me wrong–I don’t want a draft and I don’t think that’s the answer. But I think Congress should raise taxes high enough to pay for both wars. I suspect that the national outcry would be so loud, getting us out of both places would be the only option. And it would happen faster than you can say Semper Fi. Those that have been pushing and pushing for us to go and for us to stay and for surges would change their minds pretty quick if they had to deal with a fifty-percent tax rate. Or if they couldn’t get any gas for their cars because it was all going to Humvees in Afghanistan.
I don’t think Americans really believe in this war. And I suspect that, if asked to put their money, or their comfort, or their kids where their mouths are, those that support it would sing a different tune.
But as the wife of a U.S. Marine–a 26 year old guy who already faces a lifetime of mental and physical recovery from injuries sustained in Iraq in 2004–I feel I have to speak for my family and for other military families. No matter which side they’re on. No matter how unhappy I am that we are stuck in Afghanistan, I have to remind everyone that there are women (and men) raising children alone, waiting for word from loved ones. There are mothers, fathers, brothers, sisters, aunts, uncles, cousins who dread the news every day, wondering if there Marine or sailor or soldier will come home and if so, will that service member be the same person that left?
There are women who, upon the happy occasion of their husband or boyfriend’s return, find that he is not the person they sent away–he is angry and, in some cases, violent. There are children who have to adjust to an absent parent, then adjust again when a stranger comes home and tries to be Mommy or Daddy.
We military families are tired. And we want our spouses and loved ones home NOW. But for us, at least for now, that just isn’t possible. So we want the support of this country, even if you don’t believe in either of these wars. Because a repeat of one of the worst mistakes of Viet Nam is possible here–and as a feminist, as a believer in diplomacy over violence, cooperation over war, failure to support the people OUR government sends into harms way, failure to do everything we can to help their families while they are gone and when they come home (or worse) will only compound the tragedy of this (these) war.
1PhilosopherP
wrote on 2 December 2009 at 13:29
I think that the class divisions in the U.S. are played out in military enlistment. Poor families have much less influence than do wealthy ones — and the sons and daughters of the wealthy don’t go to war.
I also think that much of the impact of this war on families is hidden from the general public. Military families of active duty folks tend to cluster around bases and often keep to themselves. Families of reservists are more integrated into the society, but they seem to worry alone. Either way, it isn’t the case that the impact of the war is clear to folks outside of their immediate circles — many of whom are not wealthy.
2Mrs. Mastro
wrote on 3 December 2009 at 13:41
Philosopher–you are exactly correct! If class isn’t the reason everyone joins its very high on the list! And I would say, particularly in a down economy, that $$ is the reason a lot of people stay in, even when they have had enough. It is hard to walk away from a steady paycheck and good health insurance, especially when you know the civilian job market sucks and even more especially when you have dependents who need the security you can provide by re-enlisting.
For your second point–exactly! I live near a Marine base and there is a noticeable difference in awareness/understanding/attitude between the people here and the people just an hour or two away. The war(s) don’t touch their daily lives, it isn’t something they spend a lot of time talking to their kids about or really paying attention to at all. Bush did a very good job of disengaging the American public from Iraq and Afghanistan and I think military families pay for it.
It seems clear to me that the U.S. withdrew from Viet Nam primarily due to public outcry–information about the reality of it was made public in a way that it certainly is not here. But I deal with it every day. I’m the one my husband talks to about what he’s been through, what he’s seen and even what he’s done, if he talks at all (which is rare).